Week 7: Baby or bloat?

Ok today I officially freaked out! I'm only 7 weeks pregnant and have put on 3 inches around my waist. My waistbands are starting to dig in and everything is just feeling uncomfortable. WTF?! The baby is only the size of a fingernail - with apparently nubs where its fingers and toes will be.

This has taught me 2 things. I don't actually want to know what's happening to this alien in my belly. Nubs - eurgh! It just sounds so disgusting. Secondly, don't believe everything you read. According to all the literature you get given, you don't start putting on weight until about week 12. As someone who exercises regularly and eats well, I was so flummoxed as to why I put the weight on so started researching it. Thank god for Google!

It seems that the 3 inches I've put on are thanks to gas and possible constitpation. Mmm, delicious. All these films that portray pregnancy as this wonderful, romantic time are so off the ball. I don't think a stomach that's 3 inches bigger than normal and the passing off regular wind is really that attractive.

Doing my bit of internet research has helped me feel better. Lots of other people are bigger than I am at my stage. It's also given me hope that there are lots of un-yummy mums like me that aren't gushing about this miracle of life and are in fact, slightly repulsed by the whole thing!

My only worry now though is that according to some of my Google research, I might be expecting twins...

Week 4: Shock. Horror. Excitement. Delight!

Hello there. My name is Jayne and I'm pregnant. Not a hugely shocking confession, but it is for me. I've never ben maternal or particularly wanted kids, but have recently found out that that's exactly what's going to happen to me in um, about 9 months.

Even though this is an unexpected pregnancy, I'm not 16 or single or unemployed... in fact, I'm married, 36 and in a great full-time job that pays an above average wage. So why am I worried?! I'm of that selfish generation who have done exactly what they wanted and when they wanted - including a fabulously hedonistic 5 years of being single.

This isn't to say that I'm not happy about the news, it's just a bit unexpected and well, not very me. I don't gush over small baby-sized shoes; I'm not that woman who runs to see the baby in the room and I'm certainly not the type to go goo-goo when friends tell me they're pregnant. I am however quite brilliant with kids and helped bring my niece up when she was very small. I'm on their wavelength you see and understand exactly what they want so I know I'll make a good mum, however, I won't fit into the mould of what a good mum should be.

So this is why I'm writing my blog. I can't be the only non-gushy mum out there but when you read all the literature available, you start to think you're in the minority. My doctor gave me a book when I found out I was pregnant and frankly it was so saccharine sweet that it made me want to be sick. Gushing over baby clothes, rowing with husbands due to hormones - pah, that is so not me. It made me feel lonely as opposed to part of a community, but instead of being sad old mum-to-be, I thought I'd get my feelings out there and hopefully help other people who feel the same - I know you're out there.

Follow my journey here - I promise there won't be any gushing, plus I'll be giving real tips on how to cope with this huge change, including how to look great when you're very fat!!